It was early in the morning and the Husband was leaving for work, or so he thought. There was a knock on the door seconds after he went out. I knew it had to be him so I answered the door, and with a sheepish but already tired look on his face, he said he had forgotten his keys. As he was retrieving them from their place on the key holder, I stood in the doorway looking out into the pasture at a herd of deer grazing down in the meadow. What a beautiful sight. They were scattered and I started counting heads. I announced my find when I got to six, because that is usually an impressive number (of deer). Then I noticed a seventh and then an eighth one near the fence line. Then I saw a ninth one in a grove of trees. Beautiful, I thought!
The Husband didn’t have time to savor the moment along with me, so he quickly gave me another smooch, closed the door since I was on the steps by now and out of his busy way. I thought about getting the camera for a Kodak moment, but decided to just remember the moment instead, so I could watch the deer. When they heard the truck go rumbling down the driveway they decided it was time to exit. I was glad I stayed to watch this cute little adventure as they each made their way back into the trees and off to their next breakfast stop.
It was time to do the morning chores and since I was already outside, why not do them in my robe. It wasn’t too cold, too wet or too muddy and besides, morning coffee was calling me. Off I went and chatted with the pregnant does as I fed and checked them, tossed some feed to the noisy hens as I counted heads, cheered up the rabbits with some feed and politly asked Biscuit, the guardian dog, why a herd of deer were in our meadow and she wasn’t announcing it with her usual barking. The answer was obvious – she was people watching this morning (us)...
All things good, so I headed back to the house, went up the back steps and turned the door knob. It didn’t turn. Tried again and then reality set in and I felt a funny queezy feeling in my stomach. I knew immediately that the Husband, who closed the door behind himself, automatically turns the knob to lock the door in order to “keep me safe”, that is, inside. But, I’m outside on the steps... hmmm
I mentally accessed the situation - no keys hiding outside, like normal people. No cell phone in my pocket, like normal people. No extra key hiding in the car to drive somewhere. And no way I’m walking to get help in my bathrobe. As the old Irish song goes, “the humor is off me now” suddenly came to mind.
It’s going to be a long day.
Normally at this time of year, all windows are closed and latched until it warms up a bit during the day. But, then I remembered that I did not lock the kitchen window over the sink the night before. A rare thing indeed, and why, I don't know. I just didn't. I'm guessing that God knew well ahead of time what kind of mess I'd be in this morning, and I was so grateful for that! So, now all I had to do was find a ladder. That was the easy part. Climbing up the ladder without falling, and then tumbling into the kitchen sink and then out of it without breaking any bones was the big test. Did I mention that I'm 60-something, not 20-something?
All went well and I surprised even myself. This was not the first time in over thirty years that I've had to break into my own house, but it usually didn't go as smoothly. But despite the fact that the humor was definately off me for a time there, I do feel a little amused with myself for accomplishing such a dare so early in the morning!
It must be the Luck of the Irish, or more appropriately, a kiss from God!
~ Gwen of IRISH ACRES
FOR THE COURIOUS: Lyrics to the little Irish tune mentioned above.
The Humor is on Me Now
Author: words and music by Richard Hayward
Oh, as I went out one mornin' It bein' the month of May
A farmer and his daughter I spied upon me way.
And the girl sat down quite calmly
To the milkin' of her cow,
Sayin' I will and I must get married for the humor is on me now.
Oh, the humor is on me now.
Oh, the humor is on me now.
Sayin' I will and I must get married for the humor is on me now.
So at last the daughter married
She married well to do
And loved her darlin' husband
For a month, a year or two.
But Sean was all a tyrant,
And she quickly rued her vow,
Sayin' I'm sorry I ever got married for the humor is off me now.
Oh, the humor is off me now.
Oh, the humor is off me now.
Sayin' I'm sorry I ever got married for the humor is off me now.